Otto is a dumbass. Otto never listens. Everyone warned Otto about the shortcut through the woods after dark but Otto is 18 and Otto knows everything there is to know. He thinks.
Otto will be eaten
For the longest time Owen and his buddies tormented Corkman, a meek individual with no backbone to speak of, until one day when Corkman found a manual on eBay on how to make his own weapons. Corkman, driven by hatred and revenge, fashioned a laser powered spud gun using his newly acquired weapons knowledge and set out to get payback from Owen the Tormentor. He was caught on camera as seen above, in the act of revenge buggery at gunpoint: An incident that Owen will never recover from, both emotionally and physically.
One day, a stupid pigeon left its home in the concrete jungle to visit the carnivorous forest.
It found a little clearing in the woods and set about pecking and scratching for food in the sand and pebbles of the clearing. Pecking and scratching like it was foraging for food in the concrete jungle.
Pecking and scratching like Direwolf wasn’t napping a few feet away.
However, Direwolf WAS napping a few feet away from the flying rat. Direwolf taught the little fucker a lesson and bit its head off before it even THOUGHT about going airborne.
Pigeon bodies make a good enough appetizer. Heads? Not so much. So Direwolf decided to deliver the pigeon head back to the humans in the concrete jungle. Direwolf left the head at the edge of a hotel parking lot for all the losers to stumble across and ponder on their way to/from their wedding receptions, conferences and stupid dress-up conventions.
Consider it a gift from the Direwolf and a reminder that the Carnivorous Forest is in your back yard.
You seem to love it when I abuse you, you beg for treats but I refuse you,
you love to go for rides in cars so I drive you miles from home and try to lose you,
I inappropriately rub your fur the wrong way
and step on your tail almost every day,
You’re terrified when I chase you from room to room
with the wicked puppy-mulching vacuum,
no matter what I do you won’t go away,
in fact, you choose to stay!
I’m your master, you’re my dog, but somehow I live to amuse you,
and you fucking love it when I abuse you.